A good lesson learnt last Sunday

Today 24 July 2005
The caption that caught my attention read: "What makes S'poreans REALLY ANGRY?"

The Sunday Times wrote about the country's rage trigger points.

Last Sunday 17 July 2005
This Sunday would not just another lazy Sunday.
This is the day when my elder brother flew into a rage and torn me down by his words. I was sitting in the bedroom watching TV alone. Then I overheard a loud converstation between my mum & my brother about the house not kept tidy always. He mentioned that he once saw a lizard in the bread. I walked into the kitchen and remarked that "sometimes, there are people who always did not tie up the bread properly after eating." Upon hearing that remark, he flow into a rage. He insisted that I am implyng that it was his wife I am accusing. Even got her to "testify" that it was not her fault. Immediately called my sister on her handphone to see if she is the real culprit. My sister admitted that she would forget sometimes. Then he turned back to me and said that I am always wrongly accusing others. Pointed out all my wrongdoings, both past and present. He did his best to hurl all kinds of unkind words at me. There is no case for me. I realised I couldn't say anything that can make the situation better. I didn't think for a moment I can pray. It was just waves of tsunamis of unkind words against me. I gave up. That Sunday, my brother had the final victory. That I am a low-class, lazy trouble-maker, rumor spreader. He won his case. But he lost something too. The respect I had for him.

I sat down and thought what happened?? Why would a mere remark, words like "someone always forget to tie up the bread" would make someone fly into a RAGE? Guess he had all along wanted to say all these things. But he lacked a good opportunity. Now he found one.

I can understand more clearly now how Jesus would have felt when he was hurled all kinds of abuse.
I know my comparison is lousy.
For Jesus had no deceit in his mouth and did no wrong.
I sinned and did many wrongs.
Isaiah 53:7: “He was oppressed and He was afflicted, Yet He did not open His mouth; Like a lamb that is led to slaughter, And like a sheep that is silent before its shearers, So He did not open His mouth.

It took me a long one week before I can open my mouth and try to release forgiveness. It was a difficult week for me. Even to pray. Un-forgiveness is like a slow poison. It poisons the un-forgiver. It makes a believer slow to hear, quick to accuse, dull to God’s voice, bitter over own self, losing joy.

The devil probably planned all this in advance. Why?

I have a close colleague whom nephew is critically ill in TTSH. Knowing that I am a Christian, she asked if I would be willing to pray for him? “Why not?” So I went to visit him at TTSH and prayed for him. That creepy little fellow(the devil) then sneered at me, the un-forgiveness I was still harboring in my heart. “Would God listens to your prayers???”
Normally I would have nothing to thank the devil for.
But this time, I thank him, for reminding me.

During cell group time, I prayed to release forgiveness. Honestly, it’s easier said than done. But I knew I have to do it. The good thing is that time will slowly erase the memories of those unkind words being spoken to me. The better thing is that God can makes the process much faster. Only if I let Him to.

I know that the Lord suffered a lot for my sake. I love Jesus and I will continue to live for Him. I am not perfect, and I am not struggling to be one. Thank the Lord for moulding me.